At the moment my state of mind is a place affected by three forces, apathy, guilt, and serenity. My actions are the same, what matters is how I feel about it.
Apathy is the position of not wanting to do very much, brought on by a feeling of there being little point in doing more than the minimum. My position, expectations, and experiences are unlikely to change very much, why try?
Guilt is the feeling that I am wasting my time, not working hard enough, somehow letting people down, not making the most of things.
Serenity is acceptance of a lucky life. Loved, comfortable, safe, surrounded by a beautiful world there to be noticed.
Solution? Do the minimum that satisfies the guilt, keep trying to notice what I have.
Solutions are harder to do than decide.
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