I Woke Up Angry Today

Although "Woke up" is not strictly accurate. I transitioned grumpily from a fusty semi-conscious state into lip-curling sentience at the sound of The Face of Evil trying to be good while chewing the carpet. He'd very quietly annoyed the cat for most of the previous four hours.
5:30 am on a sunday morning can be wonderful. When, on occasion, one rouses oneself and goes out to see the sky lightening and to taste that special air of a spring dawn 5:30 am on a sunday is beautiful. When one regularly arises at that time to stand in damp shoes in a park so that an animal can be happy rather than oneself, the allure of such moments slashes its wrists and drives off a cliff. At least Christina likes the dog. Yesterday I liked the dog, today is not looking so good.
People get dogs to make themselves happy, but I'm beginning to beome skeptical as to whether this works or not. Clearly dogs are extremely good things for falling in love with, but that doesn't necessarily equate to happiness. I think we've all seen people make themselves miserableout of love. It is the very regard for Larry that makes me do all these things that I resent. But perhaps the problem is that I'm too aware of these things. Scientific research of mothers has shown that mothers report that their children make them happy (my mother says having children was the best thing she has ever done, which is an excellent thing to say to your children) and yet when asked to rate their happiness at the actual time mothers rate interacting with their children as equally enjoyable as housework. People tell themselves that things are good, even when often they aren't. I wish I was better at that.
But the biggest message of the day is that for me, sleep is a requirement for a positive attitude.

Later on I shall be writing a recruitment post on craigslist for new musicians for my band. I haven't done this in eighteen months, and since I am cranky I am not looking forward to it. Bands are strange entities, groups of people often brought together not through any compatibility but through a single shared desire (often only moderately shared) who then must cooperate at an extremely high level with an enormous risk of humiliation. I can see why so many people quit bands they just joined, but I don't have to like it.